The future of intimacy coordination: beyond scripted TV

Intimacy coordinators (IC) could offer so many benefits to our industry beyond the world of scripted TV and film. The role of an IC has much broader scope than the choreography of intimate scenes in drama. 

In the Bectu guidance for shooting intimacy, it delineates the various services of intimacy coordination including overseeing closed sets, liaison with heads of department, documentation, advocacy, collaboration, additional welfare, intimacy choreography and consultancy. It’s this final service of “advising the employer… on consent-based practices” that led MTV, Nest and Paramount+ to approach me for their production of Dating Naked UK. Many of those other services that ICs provide came in very handy too. 

I was brought onto Dating Naked UK in more of an advisory role, or an “expert” - which as I learned is the term the unscripted world likes to use.

At the very start of the process we decided on “Intimacy Consultant” as my title because I technically wouldn’t be coordinating any intimate content (and obviously no choreography), due the nature of unscripted television.

The term intimacy consultant has existed in the intimacy coordination field for a while now. The Intimacy Professionals Association sees the role as experts who “provide feedback on authenticity” (again mostly for scripted). Yarit Dor, a UK intimacy coordinator who has been instrumental in shaping intimacy practice for screen, defines an intimacy consultant as an “intimacy professional [who] only provides support in pre-production by giving guidance, protocols and paperwork”.

Paramount realised early on their plans to create a naked dating show would require the highest response in terms of welfare care and, particularly, professional advice throughout. Paramount and Nest Productions found that unscripted formats were unfamiliar territory for intimacy consultants and as far as we are aware, Dating Naked UK is the first reality TV show to use one; and did so right the way through casting, pre-production, shoot, post and promo shoot. 

The Dating Naked UK team were so supportive of the intimacy consultancy work from the start and in conjunction with Paramount’s contributor welfare lead Caroline O’Dwyer and Nest’s senior welfare lead Lisa Chapman, we got to planning the various interventions that were needed throughout the production process. 

The role of the intimacy consultant in unscripted

Before casting began, I was involved in supporting the writing of the protocols for contributor welfare, and suggesting consent-forward language for the casting team that allowed applicants to have full agency over their decision to progress with the audition process.

Once applicants had been cast, the contributors all had 1-2-1s where I provided consent training and gave them space to raise any concerns.

Being independent from production we were able to mitigate any potential power dynamics: contributors would be able to bring things to me they may have felt they couldn’t bring to production - for example issues they felt embarrassed about, deeply personal concerns, or out of fear of sounding ‘too difficult’.

Having a first point of contact on anything to do with being naked on screen meant contributors knew who to turn to with any concerns in that area.

This mirrors the relationship I have with actors in the scripted space.

Alongside this, I supported the production with on-set etiquette, closed and sensitive set protocols, and advised on modesty garments should contributors wish to wear them for any health or safety reasons.

I trained all of the crew on location (my training was translated into Spanish for the local crew), the post-production team and even the host, Rylan. I was so impressed with the production’s commitment to welfare, which made it compulsory for anyone wanting to work on this production to have this intimacy training.

The emphasis for unscripted TV (or at least from my experience from Dating Naked UK) was that welfare wasn’t an add-on, it was central to the production process.

And this made me and NEST ponder why there isn’t more cross-pollination between unscripted and scripted.

Consent is sexy

The feedback from producers and execs was that the training made a huge difference for the cast. Some of my favourite moments of the show are seeing where contributors ask for consent - such as before hugs, physical contact, a kiss - or being so open about arousal. I remember Sophia Burton, our senior welfare producer, telling me the contributors’ motto was “consent is sexy”.

Knowing this became the culture was incredible, as it was a precondition for protecting the contributors as much as possible in the given format. It had been so important to us, and it became apparent it was of huge importance to our cast too.

Even for an unscripted production where contributors aren’t in states of undress, the impact of an intimacy consultant could be huge. If we think about how many issues have been caused in unscripted TV because boundaries were either knowingly or unknowingly crossed, this role could be truly transformative for productions.

I’m looking forward to watching our industry continue to take this on board, and seeing more intimacy consultants on unscripted series - it would truly benefit everyone.